Thursday, January 25, 2007

And Many More From Channel Four

Today is my birthday. I'm 35 years old. No big whoop because age is just a number and I'm still able to pick my gray hairs out of my head every few months when they show up. Thank you Grandpa Gene for your genes!

Thirteen Memorable Galoot Birthdays

  1. 1990 - I came home Sunday night from a weekend at Kentucky Colonel's house. As soon as I walked in the front door my Saint Eileen (my mother) told me to go down to the den because the Organ Grinder (my stepfather) wanted to have a talk with me. I felt I must be in trouble for something. Bracing myself for the worst, I went down the stairs, only to find my closest high school friends waiting for me. Surprise!
  2. 1976 or 1977? I remember some uncles and aunts coming over to the house on Long Island. The memorable present was a "Star Trek" playset (the main deck of the Enterprise with a transporter room off to the left.)
  3. 1993 - My girlfriend and I had broken up that week and my Grandpa Ed died around the same time. I hid out from my fraternity brothers so they wouldn't drag me off to St. Louis for a birthday pub crawl. Two freshmen, who would soon pledge our fraternity, snuck a six pack up to my room and shared it with me. Good times.
  4. 1978 - New Jersey apartment. Don't remember the gifts, but I do remember disco dancing and pin the tail on the donkey!
  5. 1979 - Kentucky house on Arbor Court. Saint Eileen made a pan cake that was made to look like my basketball jersey. She made very good pan cakes.
  6. 1991 - I returned to Kentucky on my holiday break and threw a party for myself at Chuck E. Cheese. More good times!
  7. 2002 - My first birthday in Jamestown. I share this life event with the Mayor (my father-in-law) and the next day is Mr. Social (brother-in-law)'s. The whole fam damily went to Hultman's in Falconer to eat. Hultman's is a neat family-run restaurant that basically takes up the first floor of a house. Good eats!
  8. 1999 - My first birthday with PGirl.
  9. 2000 - My second birthday with PGirl. These last two are most special because they involved the two of us. No kids yet, beginning to plan our future together. Just the two of us.
  10. 2001 - I certainly enjoyed my birthday, but I was also anticipating the June birth of PGirl Jr.! A few months later we would see our first images of her during an after-hours, undercover visit to a hospital visit in Tennessee. Thanks to Sylvia's sister for sneaking us in!
  11. 1996 - It sucks to have to rehearse on Super Bowl Sunday. But I lived through it and made it to BradyBoone's apartment for his party. A woman I had been set up with by Boone's fiance brought a cake for me. We'd been on a few dates but nothing ever happened with her.
  12. 1995 - Another Super Bowl Sunday rehearsal. This time I went to my cousin Eddie's house to celebrate the game. Little fanfare for my b-day. That's cool.
  13. 1972 - I sprung forth from Saint Eileen's loins! Liberation!

Thursday, January 18, 2007

13 Things on My Blog From N to Z

N="Nosy", my second ever post.
O= Odiferous, my toots stink the most.
P=Preppygirl, who rings my bells.
R="R" - And you know what else?
S=Swayze is the man. He's like no other.
T=Tim, or the Mick. Galoot's little brother.
U=Uncle Tupelo, the world's greatest band.
V = Fourth letter in Pavement, a group that was grand.
W= "Whack", which describes my B-Boy son.
X= Making my porn name was fun!
Y = "Yes, And" An Improv Golden Rule, Which I Used This Past Yule...
Z = 3rd and 4th letters of Jazz, look at the pic and pick out the spaz!

Monday, January 15, 2007

Slaughter House 23

PGirl Junior called for me to come upstairs last night. Now, I'd been mentally preparing myself to watch two hours of the season premiere of "24" and was prepared for all manner of torture, explosions and other senseless violence (Jack delivered, too, by biting a man's throat out. Yes. He.Bit.It.Out. Lost Boy indeed!). Anyway, nothing could have prepared me for what I saw when I entered her room.


The ladybug bean bag's contents were off-limits to my daughter and son. They had been for some time. PGirl has encountered the bean bag injured before, but never so grievously. This was likely going to result in a funeral for our comfy furniture friend.

Our daughter had obviously called me up, because the original PGirl would have had a considerably more animated and angry response than me. I took it in stride. But then I actually looked at the culprit.


I had to stifle a laugh. PGirl came upstairs to look. I excused myself to use the potty, looking for relief from the oncoming storm. My wife was surprisingly calm, raising her voice over the vacuum cleaner motor to tell the kids to stop tracking bean bag guts around the house.

PGirl Jr. wasn't very remorseful. Please note the lint brush in her hands. I'm pretty sure she was more concerned with cleaning her clothes than with hiding the crime. My little attempted murderess would likely follow Martha Stewart's prison example.





In unrelated news, the kids are home with me today and I actually planned an activity with them. We made some chocolate chip cookies today. Enjoy the pics...

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Hazy Shade of Winter

The snow finally arrived in Western New York this week.

Here are:

Thirteen Things That Happened On Hump Day

  1. Woke up to a two hour school delay.
  2. Used the snowblower for the second time this winter.
  3. Found out that the delay turned into a school closure.
  4. Emailed to my coworkers that I'd be working out of the home to watch PGirlJr. on her first snow day of 2007.
  5. Did some laundry.
  6. Did some work.
  7. Lost, then recovered the wireless signal from the home DSL line.
  8. Baked a frozen pizza for lunch and made popcorn for a snack.
  9. Cooked dinner at 2pm and stored in the fridge for later.
  10. Threw snowballs at the kids.
  11. Made snow angels with the kids.
  12. Took a call from an asshole telemarketer. I kid you not, this guy was along the lines of that infamous AOL service cancellation call that was featured on the Today show.
  13. Sat in my thermal underwear while typing this post.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Winter Wonderlands

I figured I might fire one off here during my desktop lunch.

Whether you are in warm or cold weather...

A few good movies that take place in winter:
  1. Wonder Boys
  2. Guarding Tess
  3. Uncle Buck
  4. Groundhog Day
  5. The Breakfast Club
Holiday Honorable Mention (For those of you who can still watch Christmas Movies in January and not get depressed.)
  1. Nobody's Fool (with Paul Newman)
  2. The Family Stone
  3. Just Friends

Friday, January 05, 2007

Guilt Trip

From a MySpace Bulletin. The taker is supposed to type in "guilty" or "innocent". I'm just going to answer the damn questions.

1. Dated outside your race?
Yes. Jamaican/Canadian.

2. Given a hickey?
I don't think so.

3. Dated your best friend?
I'll assume this means dating someone who started out as best friend. No.

4. Sung in the shower?
Not in some time.

5. Spit in someone's drink?
No.

6. Broke up with someone?
Yes.

7. Opened your Christmas presents early?
Yes.

8. Took a Christmas present back?
Yes.

9. Seen "The Goonies" more than 10 times?
Are you kidding? I own the special edition DVD!

10. Had more than five REAL bf/gF?
Yes.

11. Played a computer game for more than 5 hours?
In my younger days, yes.

12. Ran through the sprinklers?
What else would I do with one? Yes.

13. Ate food that fell on the floor?
Still do.

14. Went outside naked?
Boynton Beach.

15. Made out with your best friends bf/gf?
I've probably felt like it, but no.

16. Mooned somebody?
Yes.

17. Been on stage?
Over 100 times and counting.

18. Made someone cry?
Yes.

19. Been in a parade?
As a Boy Scout, on a classic TV Christmas character float and carrying a 150 pound teenager on my back.

20. Been in a school play.
Many.

21. Drank beer?
I love Yuengling and Southern Tier.

22. Gotten detention?
Once for making a crack in typing class about Ann Wilson's (of Heart) weight. Seriously.

23. Been on a plane?
Several times.

24. Been on a cruise?
No.

25. Broken into a house?
Only my own.

26. Gotten a tattoo?
My skin is as uninked as the day is long.

27. Gotten piercings?
They would hurt too much.

28. Cried so hard you threw up?
Flip that around and you get a yes.

29. Gotten into a shouting match?
A few times.

30. Been skinny dipping?
Boynton Beach.

31. Spun yourself in circles to get dizzy on purpose?
As a Boy Scout and in college.

32. Laughed so hard it hurt?
Yes. Those are special times.

33. Tripped on your own feet?
Weekly.

34. Cried yourself to sleep?
Not for several years.

35. Cried in public?
Check the wedding video.

36. Thrown up in public?
Behind a church west of Chicago. I wasn't drunk, though. Stomach flu.

37. Lied to your parents?
How high can you count?

38. Slept in class?
Tried it once.

39. Made out with someone and didn't talk to them the next day?
Not since college.